Crossroads

Everybody faces this situation in their lives. A point where they have to choose which path they want to take. I already faced this life changing experience back in sophomore year. It was after my 21st birthday. Prior to that, I was still an immature teenager who was still living his high school days. Yes, in my mind I was still in MRSM PC and 17 years old, even though I was actually already 20+ of age and studying in the US.

This is the truth. I'm not making things up here. At that time I was still making dumbass immature jokes. Well the people who have my MSN since freshman year have noticed the wild statements, jokes or accusations I put on my MSN status. The Siti Musliha and the anjing thing were the peak of my humiliation. The dudes here in Madison keep on bringing those up so I guess I have to admit my immaturity had a big impact on my image. I didn't get the respect I deserve or perhaps, since I was acting like a child, I deserved to be treated like one.

Anyhew, my 21st bday came and I was suddenly shocked to realize that I was already an adult. I was no more the teenager who could do or say anything he wants without thinking what were the consequences. My problem was I was still thinking and acting like a 17 year old. To change from 17 to 21 years old in a flash was impossible for me and there was a time when I went to an identity crisis phase. It was hard for me. I was afraid what I say might make my friends angry or pissed off coz I do have a big mouth.

Even though it took me a while, somehow I survived that phase. But now I face a new crossroad; stepping into the working world. I spend my days now looking for jobs instead of registering for classes. I have been spending money on buying formal shirts and pants and ties instead of textbooks. Previously, every mistake I made only affected my grades. From now onwards, I might get my ass fired and that means a lot to me coz I have to survive on my own money now. JPA is not going to aid me with anything. I can't ask my parents for money coz ... I'm not a boy anymore, I am a man and a man has to be responsible for himself.

There's a new world out there for me I'm about to explore. I might face a few challenges, I even might fail and disappoint myself. I just hope that I have the courage to go through those obstacles and bounce back. Hopefully ...... hopefully everything turn out fine for me and I would end up leading a prosperous and wonderful life (crossing my fingers).